“Never put your wishbone where your backbone ought to be”. As a curvy, voluptuous woman I have had to employ the following tactics in my life. As a belly dancer it is also relevant. Just because a performer is in the public eye doesn’t mean they are willing to be scrutinized. The only who can stop people from mistreating you is You.

Dances With Fat

I recently heard the phrase “Never put your wishbone where your backbone ought to be”.  The same day I read that, I got an e-mail from a woman telling me about how she doesn’t know what to do because her friends and family are so mean to her about her weight.  She said that they treat her horribly, always say nasty things to her etc.

A lot of us have been there – with families, friends, strangers –  we can be subjected to all kinds of poor treatment because of how we look.  This is a situation that requires backbone, not wishbone.  As people of size, hell as people at all, if we want to be treated well we can’t wish for it, we have to demand it.  Here’s one way I’ve found to do that:

Step 1: Decide what your boundaries and standards are

You get to decide how…

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